Parallel Structure

           

My name is William Giles Lester Wright. My name is speed, power, and focus. And I just ate your dog. Born on the eve of November 5^th, 1995, I am the messiah. Praise me! Praise cocoa skin! Praise my feet! I walked into walmart the other day and they upped the price of my favorite cereal. That is not alright.

I am versed in several types of sign language. The stop sign, rosedale boulevard, all have been concocted by these battered fists. These eyes have seen the darkness of the Vancouver riots. These hands have grabbed the very essence of life. And this mouth, with these lips, has have had more influence than Helen on Troy. Thy bosom, bellows through the mountains, thundering with rage!! And every now and then I talk to my sister Samantha on the phone. She goes to Queen’s university now. She says it’s alright.

Malinteripe, conrutation, gamloodrondle. Fascleflop, iopenrulan, hamrenhoggle. These are words I made up because I can. I can make up words. I can flintendrop. I can make you eat. Because, because I am Mohmar Ghadafi. I dictated the Egyptians, Dictated the heavens, Dictated god himself. And when Eve ate my apple I made sure she paid the price. She now mops floors in Safeway.

If you looked into my eyes, you’d lured into an abyss of azure and grandeur. If you searched my hair you’d find a realm full of dwarfish Nomads, scouring the plains of my scalp in search of herds of zebra. If you cut my toenails, I’d give you a weird look, almost to say “why are you cutting my toenails.” But if you looked at my face you’d realize. You’d realize I’m gorgeous. I’m hotter than grendel on a Saturday morning after a night out. Peace, out.